on the window ledge of that 23rd story

The blankness of the primordial soup I call "my mind" is troubling as the words "bridging non-living and living matter" come in and out of focus in front of my eyes. It's trying to tell me that the world I know today actually spontaneously originated in an ocean surrounded by a reducing atmosphere when an amino acid had a revelation and turned to the phospholipids next to it and said: "let's create life". Abiogenesis. Protocell theory in a cynical nutshell. We clearly come from inorganic compounds. Clearly... Maybe this explains our incapability of creating an even slightly likely evolutionary theory. Is faith enough to explain the complexity of the creation around us or are we going to cling to our Big Bang theory? Why don't coincidences like that happen in what we call "real life"? How can believing that a seemingly invisible God created all this in seven days make more sense than anything else? And yet it is what I hopelessly cling to. When I walked into science I didn't realize that I wasn't only facing the pressure of grades and medschool. "Be prepared for an ultimate assault on your faith" (Darrel R. Falk 2004). And I still don't know if I was ready for this.